What “They” Might Think…

Not feeling great tonight. We went to mom and dad’s for dinner today. Other than random overheating and sweating, which I believe is due to my medication, I felt fine during the day and, for the most part, at their house. Nearing the time we were leaving I started to feel nauseous and yucky. I wish I knew why I get this way. I hate it so much! I’d blame my meds for this too, however it’s not something that continuously bothers me or even happens all the time. I’ve had meds make me feel nauseous in the past and the feeling was pretty much constant, not off and on. I hate the feeling though. You just don’t want to do anything at all, except maybe lie down… It’s not the end of the world or anything, it’s just an unpleasant way to feel. We had a nice visit. My parents had a cake for my daughter since they weren’t here for her birthday, which was super sweet of them. They bought her a gift card for LuLu, which was what she’s really been wanting. Hopefully with that gift card, combined with another she got from a friend (for any store in Southgate mall), plus the cash she received, she should be able to at least buy a headband or perhaps a pair of socks…LOL!!! Just kidding! She’s been wanting something from there forever and I always tell her that it’s too expensive. If she wants to spend her own money there it’s her choice. So, assuming this nausea passes, we’re going shopping together tomorrow. I was a bit shocked by how much some of these parents spend for a friend’s  birthday. After her dance friends birthday party she received about $140 cash, $150 in gift cards, plus some gifts!! I mean, maybe I’m cheap or something, but I found it a little over the top to be honest. Unless I’m just the cheap mom. We usually spend from about $20 – $30 on gifts for friends, for the kids. However, the majority of these gifts averaged about $40 or higher. Maybe I am just the cheap one. I don’t know, but in my opinion that’s too much. Especially for just casual friends. I can see maybe spending more if it were for her best friend, but I don’t see myself going over $40. My oldest daughter didn’t care at all about “brand names”, but my younger one does more. Well, she worries quite a bit about what people think about her. I have talked to her about it numerous times. It worries me that she cares so much about what others think. I think it bugs me so much because I know that she got it from me. My hubby couldn’t care less what people think about him or what he has to say. He truly doesn’t care! It was one of the things that I liked about him when we first met. He wasn’t afraid to say what he’s thinking and wouldn’t dream of apologizing for who he is. He’s kind of always been like take it or leave it, like me or don’t I don’t care. On the other hand, I’ve always worried about what others think and I’ve had or perhaps have some issues with self-esteem and confidence. I always worry about being judged or about if people are going to like me or not. I’ve definitely gotten better. I understand that I am who I am and I’m not changing myself for someone. However, to be honest, I still want people to like me and I worry about my weight and what others think. I now know that generally the person doing the judging tend to show you more about themselves and usually it’s their issue, not your own. I know that “mean” people are usually  covering up their own issues with their behaviour. It’s usually a “them” problem, not mine. I just worry about my daughter and the age she’s at – the prime age for meanness…I know what it’s like, always worrying about what others are thinking and feeling like you never quite measure up to other people’s standards. I do think her dance helps with confidence, I mean she’s doing a solo this year – going out on that dance floor in front of judges by herself. She’s not cowering awkwardly in a corner with no friends, I just know she has anxiety about it and I wish I could protect her, but wherever she goes in life, she’s going to run into mean, judgmental people and she needs to learn to stand up for herself. I may be worrying for nothing, but I am the one who taught her how to worry – right?! She learned from a master worrier. I think I learned it from my mom, who also has improved. I just wished she’d worry a bit less about what my sister thinks and/or says, because I know it hurts her. And my mom is who she is and she doesn’t need to change that for my sister or anyone. I know she doesn’t want to rock the boat, but it bugs me when my sister says things to her and she doesn’t even seem to see or care (?!) about how her words affect my mom. Then my mom over-tries to make her happy and I’m not sure if my sister even notices or realizes. Oh well. Not my problem I guess. I love them both and I’m going to stop talking about it on here, before I upset or offend anyone; which I promise is not my intention!! My point is that I learned the worrying. And, my mom got it from a mother who basically brought them up with the belief that appearance is everything and everyone looking in had better think all is perfect!! Ah family! Gotta love them😘

Any-who, I’m just feeling gross, so I’m going to head to bed now. 

To help with research and treatment for Trigeminal Neuralgia please go to http://www.tnnme.com (Trigeminal Neuralgia and Me) to sign a petition to have the World Health Organization (WHO) add Trigeminal Neuralgia (TN) to their “Health topic list.”

“Hopefully one day I’ll get it right, or at least have fun, while about it I write!!”

Hey! Let me know what you think! Thanx❌😘❌‼️

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