So I’ve decided to take the plunge and give the 21 day fix a try. For those of you who don’t know what that is, it’s an intense 21 days of learning and eating clean, as well as getting regular exercise. I need to get myself and my family eating better. I have a lot of weight to lose and a lot of bad habits that I need to ditch. I’m just jumping in with both feet and changing my eating overnight. It needs to be done. My body aches, none font clothes fit, I don’t like the person I see in the mirror…the list goes on and on… Normally if I were to try something like this I’d keep it to myself – you know, just in-case I can’t stick to it. Well look where that’s gotten me??!! So here I am, announcing my intentions to the world. It’s a new way of looking at things and I’m very determined!! So one of the things you do is state your “why??” As in, why are you needing to do this program. Here goes, this is my why:

Why why why… (Forgive me if this becomes ridiculously long…)

Well, first, I want to lose weight so that I’m able to look in the mirror without cringing every time! I’m very very hard on myself. I know women, more than men, tend to rip themselves apart (especially in our heads with all of the repetitive negative thoughts). I want to love what I see in the mirror. I want to be able to get ready to go (anywhere & everywhere)super fast, instead of taking forever trying to find the clothes that hide or disguise me & still end up leaving the house feeling totally negative and self-conscious (I’m so so tired of feeling this way…).  

I live in horrid pain most of the time. My pain doc is amazing and he has been teaching me that I need to get healthy (weight-wise & food-wise & activity-wise). It could help with my pain (which is HUGE) & because the brain surgery did not work, & this is something that I can do for myself. This disease isn’t going anywhere…so do I just check out of life & give up?? Or do I fight for my life!!?? It should be a no-brainer. 

However, I’m going to need oodles of support on the bad pain days! I’m also going to need some suggestions on both quick prep meals & on recipes that can be prepared ahead of time & frozen so that I can’t use the pain as an excuse to eat like crap!! Some days I can’t even get out of bed. But, I need to try to live again!!

I just want to be fit again. I don’t want to be out of breath going up the stairs or playing with my son. (My girls are beyond the “playing” age). 

Also, I truly can’t remember the last time I felt even close to “sexy”; for myself &/or my hubby. I truly can’t recall… My goal is to write a book (or two, or three). I just love writing!! Last year I challenged myself to start a blog & to write a post each & every day of 2015. And…I did it!! Despite the pain & the exhaustion, I did it!! I proved to myself that there’s still some fight left in me. I want to use that momentum to accomplish more. I’m still writing my blog this year, but this is my year to get back onto my feet. One day at a time. (If anyone is interested in my rambling, my blog is http://www.thespiritscribe.com). 

And , finally (sorry, I can go on & on!!) I need to get my entire family eating better. We have increased the number of easy, yet super unhealthy, meals since I got sick. And, I have to start feeding them healthy food, not just myself! I want to raise healthy kids, with healthy habits. We have to set our kids on the right path & start them out right. I know it’s going to be a fight, but our eating habits are so so bad right now!

So, ramble, ramble – that’s me!!

Thanx guys. ❌😘❌‼️

To help with research and treatment for Trigeminal Neuralgia please go to http://www.tnnme.com (Trigeminal Neuralgia and Me) to sign a petition to have the World Health Organization (WHO) add Trigeminal Neuralgia (TN) to their “Health topic list.”

“Hopefully one day I’ll get it right, or at least have fun, while about it I write!!”

Tough times pulling down on you?

Let faith and hope carry you through. 

Not sure what to do or where to go?

Let your heart guide you, it will know. 

Feeling lonely, stranded, on your own?

Let those you love help bring you home. 

Confused, unsure if you should move on or stay?

Let trust in yourself show you the way.

Can’t get encouragement from those you love?

Then trust in hope and guidance from above. 

If praying isn’t the thing for you?

Find support and guidance from those around you. 

There’s always a way, even if you’re close to quitting. 

Meditation can clear your mind, while you’re quietly sitting. 

It opens you up and encourages you to trust in yourself. 

Try it, truly it can fill you with an abundance of wealth. 

There are many options, even when you feel there are none.

Hopefully my suggestions leave you with at least one!

JKC

To help with research and treatment for Trigeminal Neuralgia please go to http://www.tnnme.com (Trigeminal Neuralgia and Me) to sign a petition to have the World Health Organization (WHO) add Trigeminal Neuralgia (TN) to their “Health topic list.”

“Hopefully one day I’ll get it right, or at least have fun, while about it I write!!”

Smiling brings it all together

Work at making your life better

Happiness won’t knock down your door

You have to create what you’re looking for

Feeling sorry for yourself and doing nothing

Leaves you empty & yearning for something

How often do you sit wishing things would change

While believing your dreams are out of range

If you expect joy to come on a silver platter

You know nothing, clearly, about the matter

Happiness is yours for the taking

Smile until you’re no longer faking!

JKC

To help with research and treatment for Trigeminal Neuralgia please go to http://www.tnnme.com (Trigeminal Neuralgia and Me) to sign a petition to have the World Health Organization (WHO) add Trigeminal Neuralgia (TN) to their “Health topic list.”

“Hopefully one day I’ll get it right, or at least have fun, while about it I write!!”

Had a very quiet, relaxing day. Felt exhausted after yesterday. I get tired far too easily. It’s not like it was a big, late after hours party or something!! Basically, we stood around with champagne and a bit of visiting for the first hour – hour and a half, then we went into the actual hall or whatever fancy name they called it, and sat at our table for the rest of the evening. We were even home at a decent time. It’s super frustrating how exhausted I feel after a “night out!” So today, while my little man was at a friends house playing, I went to bed to have a short nap. Well, it turned into a very long sleep!  I ended up sleeping for most of the day. Oops!!! That was not my intention at all. However, my body must have needed the rest, because I fell asleep immediately when my head hit my pillow. I still feel tired now, despite having slept for hours. At first I was afraid that I wouldn’t be able to sleep tonight after my long afternoon nap, but I’m actually still feeling just as tired. I also barely did anything once I got up. Nope! My daughter, our sweet neighbor Tash and I caught up on the tv show called “The 100”. Of course the way it ended was by leaving everything up in the air, so you can not wait until the next episode. I generally only watch shows that we’ve PVR’d ahead of time. We had three episodes and watched them back to back. It almost feels like a movie or something when you can watch episode after episode of the same show. So it was even more frustrating when we had to stop watching them! We’re considering getting rid of cable and just using Netflix, Shomi, live streaming etc… I’m on the fence about it. I’m just not caught up with everything we have recorded and it’d be a shame to have it all taken away. Not sure what we’re going to end up doing. We’re also probably getting rid of our land line. I’m not sure if that’s the correct choice. People have said what if we need to call 911 or if the kids have to. I don’t know yet whether or not we’re going to go ahead with that. I’d hate to get rid of our number, the one we’ve had for like 15 years. Especially if we cancel it and then change our mind. We will have lost our phone number. Hmmm. Decisions decisions…Well, I think that for now I’m deciding it’s time to go to bed. So, goodnight!!

To help with research and treatment for Trigeminal Neuralgia please go to http://www.tnnme.com (Trigeminal Neuralgia and Me) to sign a petition to have the World Health Organization (WHO) add Trigeminal Neuralgia (TN) to their “Health topic list.”
“Hopefully one day I’ll get it right, or at least have fun, while about it I write!!

Awards night is over! My dad and his old partner (my dad’s retired) won an award from the Engineers association (that’s not the actual “official” name), for a distinguished contribution in consulting engineering. (Okay none of those are the correct titles at all!!) The funny thing is that he’s been designing the awards that are given to each recipient. So he was given an award that he designed and made himself – lol. The award was presented to him by the Lt. Governor and was actually a pretty big deal. We had to dress up all fancy-shmancy and there was a “walk of fame” for past presidents of the association (I took a photo of my dad’s star). So we’re on our way home after the big event. My feet are killing me right now! I have one hell of a time finding shoes to fit me. Not only do I have wide feet, but I also have extremely thick feet. I’ve had a hard time finding shoes that fit for as long as I can remember. I recall going into the “naturalizer” store with my mom way back when I was just a little kid. Yes, they had a great selection of stylish children’s shoes…not!! Well, I’m proud of my dad and all he’s done. Congratulations daddy‼️ I love you xox. I’ll leave you with some photos from tonight. 

   
    
   
  
To help with research and treatment for Trigeminal Neuralgia please go to http://www.tnnme.com (Trigeminal Neuralgia and Me) to sign a petition to have the World Health Organization (WHO) add Trigeminal Neuralgia (TN) to their “Health topic list.”

“Hopefully one day I’ll get it right, or at least have fun, while about it I write!!”

Just about went to bed without writing anything. Oops! I’d be so mad at myself!! I just spent forever doing my nails. It took so long because I’m using my LED light and giving myself gel nails. It’s not my first time doing it, it just always takes a really long time. A really really long time!! I feel like I messed them up and it’s super frustrating when you put all of that time into something and it doesn’t really work out. 😥 The formal awards ceremony gala thingy for my dad is tomorrow. I was hoping that my nails would look nice for it. They’ll do I guess. A couple of them are really bad if you look closely. However, it’s unlikely anybody will care or even notice. I think we tend (or, rather, I) tend to spend more time worrying and preparing than necessary. Also, most people are so busy worrying about themselves and what people think, that no one is really spending time judging you. We all have these concerns about what so and so will think or say, but, for the most part, so and so doesn’t even notice, because they’re busy worrying about themselves. This may all be in my head.  Or, perhaps, I just worry more than the average person. I know my hubby doesn’t care. People can think whatever they want to think, it doesn’t bother him. He’s just himself, without apology. I don’t know if that’s more of a “guys” attitude. Maybe it’s all just me. Worry worry worrying all the time…hmmm, I wonder who I got that from…

I love you momma!!

To help with research and treatment for Trigeminal Neuralgia please go to http://www.tnnme.com (Trigeminal Neuralgia and Me) to sign a petition to have the World Health Organization (WHO) add Trigeminal Neuralgia (TN) to their “Health topic list.”

“Hopefully one day I’ll get it right, or at least have fun, while about it I write!!

I had a nice homey day. I didn’t have to leave the house once, which was nice. I’m tired of the busy, running around days. The days that I feel like a chauffeur. The days when the pain is so bad but there’s no down time, quiet time, calm, slow it down time…nope it’s just run run run. Yuck! Don’t really like those days. Today I just sat watched Greese Live with my oldest daughter. We had fun singing along and just being together without having to worry about the time or getting something done or anything at all. I’m really feeling tired and worn out for some reason. I just feel like it’s been busy and go go go all the time. So, it was nice to have a quiet, do nothing day. And now I’m going to have a nice quiet night. And, this will end here, because I want to go to bed before 11:00 for once!! Zzzz…

To help with research and treatment for Trigeminal Neuralgia please go to http://www.tnnme.com (Trigeminal Neuralgia and Me) to sign a petition to have the World Health Organization (WHO) add Trigeminal Neuralgia (TN) to their “Health topic list.”

“Hopefully one day I’ll get it right, or at least have fun, while about it I write!!

Yadda yadda yadda…bla bla bla

Some days I find I have nothing to really write about. I go on about my day, but how boring that must be for people who actually read this…”today I don’t feel well…”, “I’m so exhausted today…”, “didn’t really do anything today, because I feel like crap…”, etc etc etc!!! I think that when I first began writing these posts I had all these big ideas in my head. About reaching people, saying something profound maybe, help myself and others living with Trigeminal Neuralgia by discovering some new thing to do or I don’t know, just something that would really help make things shift for me and perhaps others. I am feeling pretty negative about things today. Not sure why I feel like this…I guess I just hoped maybe I’d get inspired or inspire others or something! But, for the most part, this just seems like a diary of my very unexciting life. I know I have more in me. I want to write a book or do something with my writing, not the bla bla blas of my life. Oh well. Too bad for me. So, not really knowing what to write and not wanting to give another über exciting description of my day, or my damn pain and not really wanting to load any more negativity to the already poopy situation, I’m not going to write anything else for today. I don’t want to rant, or pout, or complain, yet that is the direction my brain wants to head, so I’m just going to call it a night and go to bed. 

Yadda yadda yadda – that’s all folks!!

To help with research and treatment for Trigeminal Neuralgia please go to http://www.tnnme.com (Trigeminal Neuralgia and Me) to sign a petition to have the World Health Organization (WHO) add Trigeminal Neuralgia (TN) to their “Health topic list.”

“Hopefully one day I’ll get it right, or at least have fun, while about it I write!!

Time sure flies by. I feel like the kids just went back to school, yet it’s the first of February tomorrow. Crazy! My daughter danced today during the intermission at the Oil Kings hockey game today. She (well, all of them) did really well. Especially considering that they only had two classes to learn their dance! Today’s game was a charity game, benefiting breast cancer. They call it “pink in the rink”. We all wore pink shirts to the game. Actually, the entire team wore pink jerseys! The stage that they danced on was kind of strangely situated. It was on the “fans” side, not on the ice. I thought that they’d probably have some sort of stage that they push onto the ice for intermission and then move for the game. But, instead, they weren’t on the ice at all and they faced towards the ice – or glass barrier in front of them. Fortunately all of our seats were right in the area beside where the stage was set up. My daughter was so nervous about being in front of so many people, but once she saw the set up, I think it helped her feel a bit more comfortable. It was probably easier for the dancers, but not so much for the audience (basically friends and family of the dancers on either side of the stage). They were recording the whole time and showing the dancing on the jumbo-tron, so lots of people were watching, they just weren’t right in front of the stage. I’m actually not trying to be overly negative about it, because they had lots of fun. They were given an excellent opportunity to practice dancing with a lot of people watching. The more often they step on stage to perform in front of people, the more comfortable they’ll get performing (does that make sense??) It was exciting for her to be going on a stage to dance in such a big arena. The same arena where she’s watched concerts, like Katy Perry. We had a good day. My face wasn’t overly bad while we were there, yay face! We got to spend a fun afternoon out actually doing something as a family. Well, plus a couple friends and grandparents (oh, grandparents are family…duh!) All in all, t was just a pretty good day. I just love to watch my daughter dancing. No complaints from me tonight. And…I’m off to bed. 

Oh yah, in-case anyone was wondering, the Oil Kings kicked butt and won he game, 6 vs 2!!!

To help with research and treatment for Trigeminal Neuralgia please go to http://www.tnnme.com (Trigeminal Neuralgia and Me) to sign a petition to have the World Health Organization (WHO) add Trigeminal Neuralgia (TN) to their “Health topic list.”

“Hopefully one day I’ll get it right, or at least have fun, while about it I write!!

Brace yourself for the shortest post in history! I’m not feeling well…well, what else is new?? I don’t even know why I continue to write that. Do I ever feel well?? I’m just tired and know that tomorrow will be a long day. I wanted to be asleep by now, yet here I am, again, writing at midnight! Argh!!! I so frustrate myself. If that makes sense…I worded that oddly didn’t I?? My daughter is dancing during the intermission at tomorrow’s Oil Kings hockey game. She’s feeling nervous and excited. I’m sure she’ll be great, but I understand the nerves. That is a huge place to be dancing in. All of the kids who did it last year warned her to not look at the jumbo-tron or she’ll get all mixed up. But now she is worrying about not looking at the jumbo-tron, she’s thinking and worrying about doing so. Again, I know she’ll do really well. I’m feeling anxious, because she’s feeling anxious. If that makes any sense to anyone. I think it is a mom thing. The anticipation and seeing her with her nerves rattling away – I just soak up that energy she’s putting off and feel the same way!! Well, I need sleep. I don’t want to feel too hellish tomorrow. And if the pain’s bad, I can’t use my medicinal marijuana at the game.  So, I really need to sleep. Night night!!

To help with research and treatment for Trigeminal Neuralgia please go to http://www.tnnme.com (Trigeminal Neuralgia and Me) to sign a petition to have the World Health Organization (WHO) add Trigeminal Neuralgia (TN) to their “Health topic list.”

“Hopefully one day I’ll get it right, or at least have fun, while about it I write!!