Tag Archives: #meditech

Nothing Good…

Today has been a very very long bed day. Meaning, I was in bed for most of it. Feel just awful and that oil kicked in. So I’ve been in bed for most of the day. I’ve had a pukey feeling all day. So, there’s no fun feeling this way, none, nada, zip!! Blech… Until tomorrow then!!

To help with research and treatment for Trigeminal Neuralgia please go to http://www.tnnme.com (Trigeminal Neuralgia and Me) to sign a petition to have the World Health Organization (WHO) add Trigeminal Neuralgia (TN) to their “Health topic list.”

“Hopefully one day I’ll get it right, or at least have fun, while about it I write!!”

Without Words On My Lips…

Here I sit without words on my lips,

Just pauses, and sighs, and my hands on my hips. 

Not sure what to write,

Don’t know what to say,

I’m feeling so blank,

I hate feeling this way!

I hate the word hate, but I just used it right there,

I’m writing things down, without feeling fully aware…

Had I felt more awake,

Or if there was less pain,

Maybe I could better focus

On the words I am saying!

Well, this poem went wrong, without direction or care,

I’ll stop while I can, I don’t have much new to share…

So good night, arivaedarce,

I’m tired and it’s late.

And I really do have to go, 

Because my son’s now awake!

(Okay, that doesn’t really rhyme, but I gotta run!!)

To help with research and treatment for Trigeminal Neuralgia please go to http://www.tnnme.com (Trigeminal Neuralgia and Me) to sign a petition to have the World Health Organization (WHO) add Trigeminal Neuralgia (TN) to their “Health topic list.”

“Hopefully one day I’ll get it right, or at least have fun, while about it I write!!”

🙄

Tired tired tired and my face hurts too. 😔

Tired tired tired and my mouth hurts too.🙁

Tired tired tired and my teeth hurts too.😞

Tired tired tired and my head hurts too.😕

Yep. Another stinking dentist appointment and this is what I’m left with…🙄 (yes, an eye roll is the last thing you get today.) 🙄

To help with research and treatment for Trigeminal Neuralgia please go to http://www.tnnme.com (Trigeminal Neuralgia and Me) to sign a petition to have the World Health Organization (WHO) add Trigeminal Neuralgia (TN) to their “Health topic list.”

“Hopefully one day I’ll get it right, or at least have fun, while about it I write!!”🙄

“The Hills…”

Today was better than the rest of the week. The pain wasn’t quite as bad. Thank goodness. When I have a long stretch of bad bad days, it’s simply exhausting! I had a fun evening with my daughter (the 13 year old…not sure why I never put names on here, it’s just a habit now). I was driving her to dance and had a relaxing evening at my mom and dad’s planned. I was going to have a long bath in their huge, jet tub. I had everything ready to go, my face mask, my book, bath stuff, and when I dropped her off she went to the studio, but the door was locked (good thing I always wait until she’s inside before leaving). Turns out that it’s teachers convention in the city, which is under a different school board than in Beaumont, so all classes were canceled and the studio was closed. So my daughter and I went to Winners, because I had seen some leggings there that I was sure she’d love (the stock changes so quickly there that I was afraid they’d be gone, but they were still there…yay!). We spent a long time there and tried a bunch of stuff on. It was nice with just the two of us, it doesn’t happen very often. Then on the way home we were driving past “The Hills, at Charlesworth” (I think that’s what it was called!) It’s a new fancy looking (and sounding) development along Elerslie Rd.  Whenever we drive past we all joke about the name and we all say it in our phoney British accents. We decided, spur of the moment, to go check out the show homes together. We had lots of fun checking out all of the different rooms and fancy master suites. It was a nice, surprise night together. And now my son is calling me and he should be asleep, so I’m outta-here for the night!!

To help with research and treatment for Trigeminal Neuralgia please go to http://www.tnnme.com (Trigeminal Neuralgia and Me) to sign a petition to have the World Health Organization (WHO) add Trigeminal Neuralgia (TN) to their “Health topic list.”

“Hopefully one day I’ll get it right, or at least have fun, while about it I write!!”

Weird Right??

Well, I’m sorry to say that today hasn’t really been much better. Maybe a tad, but that’s about it. My daughter has pink eye and she stayed home with my youngest. I had to force myself to function enough to get my daughter to and from dance. I’m not too sure about that oil stuff. I tried it early this afternoon and didn’t really notice anything, until I had to drive my daughter to the city, of course!! I felt a bit light-headed and dizzy. This may just have been because I was hungry, or the reaction to another one of my meds (I’m on many with dizziness being a side-effect). It was strange. I didn’t feel “high,” like I’m sure everyone imagines when they hear about oil or marijuana. I just felt weird. It was more than 3 and a half hours after I had tried the oil. Everything I read contradicted something else. I got myself all worried about driving, and, low and behold, I was fine once I ate. Since I was likely looking for something to feel or be different after taking the oil, I overreacted (all in my head), hours later, when I was doing my pukey, dizzy, thing I do when I’m hungry! Looking back, I’m 99% sure that it was just my tummy. I’ve been doing so well with food, that I didn’t want to mess up. So, I grabbed healthy stuff, even though it was a bit more work. I’m proud of how well I’m doing and sticking to this. I didn’t want it to be just another diet program that inevitably ends up only having short term effects or I don’t stick to it. I Iike how this program is all about teaching you clean eating. It isn’t just a short term eating plan. It’s trying to teach you new habits. Permanent, not temporary, new behaviours. It also talks about getting adequate rest. So, I’m off to bed – too late… Oh well. I can’t turn back time. And it wouldn’t have changed the late bedtime. I didn’t do my Tai Chen before my daughter’s dance, so I had to do it once I got home. We did it. My oldest is still doing it with me!! Despite the pain, I actually was functioning like a normal human-being, weird right??!!

To help with research and treatment for Trigeminal Neuralgia please go to http://www.tnnme.com (Trigeminal Neuralgia and Me) to sign a petition to have the World Health Organization (WHO) add Trigeminal Neuralgia (TN) to their “Health topic list.”

“Hopefully one day I’ll get it right, or at least have fun, while about it I write!!”

Rough, Day 3 Gazzillion!!!

I’m sorry to say, but today was no better than yesterday. I’ve had a rough go at it the past few days. Some are just bad and others are not great, but recently they’ve been rough, bad, shitty, high pain, #10 on the pain scale, etc etc , you get the picture. Today I tried oil for the first time…okay, that sounds stupid. I tried the oil version of the medicinal marijuana that I take. The ratio that I ordered is the 10/10. This means that the thc and the cbd content is equal. It was outrageously expensive almost $200 for a 50ml bottle‼️‼️ Yes, you heard me correctly…that much money for, I repeat, only  50ml’s!! I tried it out because I’ve never used it and wanted to see what it’s like. If I let it dissolve under my tongue it takes about 1 – 1.25hours before I feel anything, as opposed to “vaping” it, where it is immediately absorbed by the lungs. If I were to ingest it in some type of food, like brownie, it would take even long, closer to 2-4 hours before I would feel it. I wish I could use the oil and not have to vape at all. However, the cost of the oil makes it unlikely that we’ll be buying it all the time. I wanted some so I’d have it with me for times when I’m out and I still need the medication, but can’t vape it. So, for the most part, I’ll just have to stick to vaping and hacking away when I do. It hurts my throat so badly. But, it’s the only way we can afford it. Right after I’m done this I’m going to try the new one that I bought, the 15/5. I’m hoping it helps with sleep, but touches the pain more than the 17/1. I can sleep with the 17/1, but the 1 cbd isn’t very high. So, since I’m about to finish writing, I’m going Togo give it a puff and see if it’ll be better. Hopefully it’s not a $100 mistake!!! Cause, that would suck!!  Well, here I go and I’m about to find out!! Night All!❌😘❌‼️

To help with research and treatment for Trigeminal Neuralgia please go to http://www.tnnme.com (Trigeminal Neuralgia and Me) to sign a petition to have the World Health Organization (WHO) add Trigeminal Neuralgia (TN) to their “Health topic list.”

“Hopefully one day I’ll get it right, or at least have fun, while about it I write!!”

Rough…

Today’s been rough. So much so that I didn’t go to my art class tonight😢. I hate these days. I made myself do my Tai Chen workout, despite my face pain, so that’s something. I know that, in the long run, regular exercise is important for my health and for pain-control. Part of learning to live with severe chronic pain is making the choice to live your life. I have come to terms with the fact that this isn’t going anywhere. I’m going to have bad days and that’s that. I can take my meds, “vape” my medicinal marijuana. My goal, other than getting a bit more fit, is to have Tai Chi as a slow, calming tool in my arsenal for the bad days. Because I’m just learning, it’s not yet a gentle and slow pace. However, by the end of the videos, I will have a long sequence of tai chi exercises that I can use to calm myself. Relieving tension while I am in the midst of stabbing pain will come in handy. So, although it may be difficult now, I’m determined to complete the 90 days training without falling behind. For tonight though, I’m done and I need to sleep away my pain. Sorry this is so short , it’s all that’s left in me for tonight. 

To help with research and treatment for Trigeminal Neuralgia please go to http://www.tnnme.com (Trigeminal Neuralgia and Me) to sign a petition to have the World Health Organization (WHO) add Trigeminal Neuralgia (TN) to their “Health topic list.”

“Hopefully one day I’ll get it right, or at least have fun, while about it I write!!”

I Just Don’t Want To Say Goodbye…

I just don’t want to say goodbye 

Just thinking about it makes me cry

The order’s reversed, the times all wrong

I still think of you when I hear that song

“It’s just not fair,” I cried to God

“I’ll trade his place,” I yelled with a nod

Yet all was quiet, too quiet you see

You still weren’t back down here with me

“He can’t be gone” “he’s just a boy”

“He was filled with life, with love, with joy”

It’s still too quiet without you here

This silence fills my heart with fear

It’s pushing me to say goodbye 

I’m not sure I can, I don’t want to try 

Your face, your laugh it’s still so strong 

I sit on your bed and pretend you’re not gone

If I close my eyes and breath in deep

I can still kiss your forehead and watch you sleep

You’re still my baby, you’ll always be

That will never ever change for me 

The words remain as a lump in my throat 

Remaining quiet is what keeps me afloat 

Losing a child is just so wrong

I still think of you when I hear that song

Just thinking about it makes me cry

I just don’t want to say goodbye…

JKC 

This is dedicated to my cousin Barbra Chambers, on a very difficult anniversary, as well as my uncle and aunt Dode and Roy Chambers, because it’s there everyday… My heart aches for all of you. 

To help with research and treatment for Trigeminal Neuralgia please go to http://www.tnnme.com (Trigeminal Neuralgia and Me) to sign a petition to have the World Health Organization (WHO) add Trigeminal Neuralgia (TN) to their “Health topic list.”

“Hopefully one day I’ll get it right, or at least have fun, while about it I write!!”

⤴️Pain⤵️Energy Day

I’ve had a high pain, low energy day. Just feeling super bla. I’ve been sleepy all day. Today was the first day that I didn’t do my Tai Chen workout. I’m feeling mad at myself for not getting it done today. However, I’m not going to fall into my old cycle. Which basically is giving up because I had an off day. I tend to do that with overeating too. If I have a meal where I splurge, either by eating too much or overdoing it on dessert. It’s such an all or nothing attitude. I’m trying to teach myself to react differently. One off meal or day or whatever doesn’t mean it’s time to completely throw in the towel. It’s normal behaviour to overdo it or to miss a workout here and there. The best thing to do is just keep on moving forward. So, tomorrow will be better. Rest day is usually Sundays on the program I’m following. This week only, it will be Saturday instead. No big deal. The world isn’t coming to a halt or anything! Besides, I’ve convinced my oldest daughter to do the 90 day program with me (I know, shocking right??!). So, our official start day is going to be on Monday. This works best with the set-up of the video, with each week having 6 different workouts/week. So I’m just starting back on “day 1” on Monday (even though I’ve done the first few, I’ll just begin again.) I don’t mind repeating them because for one, if it gets my daughter’s butt of the couch, I’ll begin on Monday with her. As well, it just fits with the way the program is set up. Having a break on Tuesday’s and day 1 through 6 on Wednesday to Monday is just weird. 
I haven’t got much more to say tonight. I’m just so tired and my face is bad bad bad. It’s time for my bed-time puffer medicine (how we refer to my medicinal marijuana) and rest. I’m just so darn tired today. I can hardly keep them open. So, this is it for today. Night all💤💤

To help with research and treatment for Trigeminal Neuralgia please go to http://www.tnnme.com (Trigeminal Neuralgia and Me) to sign a petition to have the World Health Organization (WHO) add Trigeminal Neuralgia (TN) to their “Health topic list.”

“Hopefully one day I’ll get it right, or at least have fun, while about it I write!!”

Are Your Dreams A reality??

Do you follow your dreams or just dream?  

Without action dreams are just thoughts!

Have you considered how it may seem?

To only spend your time thinking lots and lots?

Turn your thoughts toward steps you can take.

What’s the first thing you could do?

To make your dreams a reality when you’re awake?

Writing things down can really help you!

Breaking things down into smaller steps,

Can turn the overwhelming into doable acts.

Then step by step, you’ll know what to do next,

And soon your dreams turn into facts!!

You’ve conquered your fears and moved ahead.

You should feel great about yourself!

Now you can dream up new dreams in your head.

And you can thrive in a fulfilling life of wealth!!

JKC

To help with research and treatment for Trigeminal Neuralgia please go to http://www.tnnme.com (Trigeminal Neuralgia and Me) to sign a petition to have the World Health Organization (WHO) add Trigeminal Neuralgia (TN) to their “Health topic list.”

“Hopefully one day I’ll get it right, or at least have fun, while about it I write!!”