I think that I’ve resolved the dance studio issue for my daughter. After a great deal of upset and frustration and some searching online and phone calls that is… There’s a lot I could say. But there’s nothing more that venting and complaining can do. I’m not sure it’s ever done anything but make me more angry and upset. I need to find a new start for her and I believe we have. Pointing fingers or calling people out won’t get me anywhere. It certainly will keep me looking backwards and after all of the crap, I need the fresh start just as badly as she does, perhaps more. I’ve been saying I’m done and now I am. I have to be. I just need to shake off the negativity and focus on the present. It is filled with opportunity!!

To help with research and treatment for Trigeminal Neuralgia please go to http://www.tnnme.com (Trigeminal Neuralgia and Me) to sign a petition to have the World Health Organization (WHO) add Trigeminal Neuralgia (TN) to their “Health Topic List.

Hopefully one day I’ll get it right, or at least have fun, while about it I write!!

My hubby’s in Yellowknife again and I hate it. It’s just weird without him here. I don’t like it. Routines are funny things. You don’t even realize how you’re relying on the calm and comfort that day to day routines give us. The whole thing gets shaken-up when someone’s removed from the equation. Suddenly everything seems off kilter. Some things aren’t getting done at all, while others are somehow different. It’s like family systems theory (please don’t quote me on this, it’s been a very long time since I learned and used my brain on people or work or, well, anything really!!); if one thing shifts in the family unit, it effects and shifts the entire family. In each of our families we define ourselves and our roles, sometimes overtly like, wife, mother, oldest child, etc, and sometimes more covertly, like, the pleaser, the independent child, the provider, the caregiver, etc. I’m not sure why I went off on this tangent or why I’m rambling on about it, but I’m just going to roll with it. I’ve witnessed, as the majority of people likely have, when people go through a divorce. (I’m in no way judging. I believe there are many very valid reasons for a couple to split up!!) What I was trying to say is that when people separate the “regular” family system is completely thrown apart. This can create many repercussions to the family, kids argue more or cry more or they may try to act “normal”, or they may shut down and not let anyone in, etc etc, a parent may now have to work out of the home, maybe they have to move, etc…Basically what I’m saying is that almost everything will change, some subtle and other changes will likely be obvious!! However, this can happen on a much smaller scale, such as, one person in the family decides to eat healthier and go for regular walks. It sends a ripple through the rest of the family and small changes or shifts may occur. The spouse of the person changing their habits, may have to watch the kids more often or drive the kids to their extracurricular activities, or, perhaps they feel resentment and decide to sabotage their spouse’s new lifestyle (consciously or unconsciously). And, then the ripple from that runs through the children, etc etc.  And, this strange post is due to my current ripples, with my hubby working out of town…

And, I don’t enjoy the ripple caused by my hubby having to travel more for work! It’s poopy!!!

To help with research and treatment for Trigeminal Neuralgia please go to http://www.tnnme.com (Trigeminal Neuralgia and Me) to sign a petition to have the World Health Organization (WHO) add Trigeminal Neuralgia (TN) to their “Health Topic List.

Hopefully one day I’ll get it right, or at least have fun, while about it I write!!

Sooooo tired. Let myself just, I don’t know, pretend that I am fine, then I pay for it later. So, I just enjoyed some nice and big tomatoes from my plants in he back yard. Mmmmm…I think it’s so easy to forget what actual, home grown food tastes like. We eat it all winter and don’t realize that the tomatoes are tasting a bit like plastic. We get the wake up call, “this is what a tomato is supposed to tast like!!” So, go ahead and enjoy the berries and peaches and all of the wonderful fruit and veggies while they’re around. Mmmmmm…

This is the biggest. I used my son’s batman ruler, because I’m cool like that!!! LOL!!!

To help with research and treatment for Trigeminal Neuralgia please go to http://www.tnnme.com (Trigeminal Neuralgia and Me) to sign a petition to have the World Health Organization (WHO) add Trigeminal Neuralgia (TN) to their “Health Topic List.

Hopefully one day I’ll get it right, or at least have fun, while about it I write!!

My hubby is off to play football this afternoon. It’s something new this year and he is really enjoying it. He has not done anything physically active in a very long time. So, this is a good thing for him. The problem is that it’s a very rough sport. And, when you’re six months shy of 40 and haven’t done any intense physical activity in years. He’s just now starting to come home after a game without feeling like he can’t move. With pain in his ankles, knees, chest, back, etc, etc… and then, just as it starts to let up, he has the next game to go to. I’m glad he’s doing something other than work and take care of us. I just worry that he will overdue it and overestimate what he can do, and end up badly hurt. He tends to do that. He thinks he can do it all. And, often, he does! But, he ends up hurting afterwards. Silly silly man. Why do men believe that they are invincible and that they can do everything the same way they did when they were 18?? It has to do with appearances and how you perceive yourself to be. Here’s my stereotype (& I know it’s not just black and white) In their heads, men feel like they have to be able to look and act “manly” or hero-like. While women, on the other hand are super hard on themselves and perceive the negative things. I wish I had half the self-assurance my hubby has!! 

To help with research and treatment for Trigeminal Neuralgia please go to http://www.tnnme.com (Trigeminal Neuralgia and Me) to sign a petition to have the World Health Organization (WHO) add Trigeminal Neuralgia (TN) to their “Health Topic List. 

Hopefully one day I’ll get it right, or at least have fun, while about it I write!!

So,the other day I was talking about what a busy time of year this is for us. Both of our girls have August birthdays (19 & 29th) and, of course, it is back to school time soon. Meaning, party planning and shopping for school supplies. We’re also planning on going out to the lake on Labor Day weekend. Also, I’m trying to figure out where my daughter is going to dance this year (I went into this yesterday!). Many many things are pouring through my mind right now. I need to take a step back and write down all that I have to do and the corresponding deadline. Hopefully I will able to de-stress myself and see the bigger picture. I’m just feeling overwhelmed. We did actually get quite a bit done today, regarding school supplies anyway. We went to Southgate, then Walmart and finally, we went to Costco. So, after all of that, I am just knackered (sorry I probably spelled that wrong!!)

To help with research and treatment for Trigeminal Neuralgia please go to http://www.tnnme.com (Trigeminal Neuralgia and Me) to sign a petition to have the World Health Organization (WHO) add Trigeminal Neuralgia (TN) to their “Health Topic List.

Hopefully one day I’ll get it right, or at least have fun, while about it I write!!

Okay. Now I know that this will come across as a huge surprise, but today I’m feeling really tired. Yep. Here it is folks! Even though I went to bed late, I did get a long sleep, because my little man and I slept in. However, I’m just so so tired!

My younger daughter and I spent some time today looking into a new dance studio. I am just done with her current school and so is my daughter. I’m tired of sending her to a dance school that basically promotes bullying and cliques. It has been gradually picking away at her confidence and self-esteem. We’ve been talking about changing dance schools for sometime now. This is certainly not a new discussion for us. For some time now we’ve questioned why we continue to pay people to hurt our child, to crush her spirit, to convince her that she’s not good enough. I’m just so done with it. I want her to remember that she loves dancing. I want her to have fun and look forward to her classes. I want her to come out of class smiling and happy. She’s a good dancer, maybe not the best, but also not the worst. I want her to be at a school where that doesn’t matter, as all dancers are treated equally and everyone is given the same opportunities to dance and perform. I was once told that a good dance teacher is one who can teach the good and talented kids to dance, but a great dance teacher can teach even the most awkward and uncoordinated kids how to dance well. Lots of venting going on, I know. My point in all of this is that we’re in the process of finding a new dance school in Edmonton. I’m not looking forward to the extra driving, but I believe it’s super important for us to do this now. Recently she has experienced a great deal of rejection and I am so so tired of seeing her face fall and watching as another little knock is notched into her heart. I’m done with people who just get caught up in their own personal bubble, with their own little world and who then make decisions or say things without much concern about other people’s feelings and how much damage their actions may cause. I’m done with bullies!! Just done!! Bye bye bullies!!

To help with research and treatment for Trigeminal Neuralgia please go to http://www.tnnme.com (Trigeminal Neuralgia and Me) to sign a petition to have the World Health Organization (WHO) add Trigeminal Neuralgia (TN) to their “Health Topic List.

Hopefully one day I’ll get it right, or at least have fun, while about it I write!!

I’m just so so so tired right now. I had a horrible sleep last night! Just bad! I don’t know why I just wasn’t able to sleep. The last time I looked at the clock before I fell asleep was 6:30AM. I’m so so tired I really just need sleep! But, of course, the night I really should sleep well, just happens to be the night before her birthday party…Yep! Tay and her friends are jamming-out to rockband as we speak (12:10am). So, I have my portable air conditioner going.  Anything to drown out the “dying cats” (my younger daughter’s words – lol). Well, she’s 18 now, so I didn’t need to buy booze for her! Nope! I just had to drive her there & pay…sigh. And I was worried about how things would change. But nothing new to report lol!

To help with research and treatment for Trigeminal Neuralgia please go to http://www.tnnme.com (Trigeminal Neuralgia and Me) to sign a petition to have the World Health Organization (WHO) add Trigeminal Neuralgia (TN) to their “Health Topic List. 

Hopefully one day I’ll get it right, or at least have fun, while about it I write!!

Eighteen years ago today, I had a beautiful baby girl. She was just perfect. A precious little bundle that simultaneously tugged on my heart and scared the crap out of me!! In that moment (after about 37 gruelling hours of labor) when you are handed your first little baby then sense of responsibility just hits you in the chest, “I am responsible for this little life” “this baby depends on me for everything” “is she really all mine” “how can she be so perfect” “how the hell am I ever going to do this” “what if I fuck it up” “I just can’t stop staring at this perfect little person, I could gaze at her forever” “I have absolutely no idea what I’m doing, but she is mine, MINE! and I will grow fangs and use them on anyone or anything that could possibly hurt her… Ummmm I wonder that includes me””I have no idea how to do this, she can’t really be completely dependent upon me, can she””Oh, God, what if I fuck this up””I can gaze at her for all of my days and come away happy””oh! Look at her perfect little toes and she has long fingers, just like me””what the hell is that black tar-like substance that is slowly oozing out of her butt…nurse…something is wrong with my baby!!!!!” “Awwww…look at the cute little grunty face she’s making while it comes out””you’re sure this is normal right””did I just say someone pooping is adorable” “oh, oh, she’s doing it again…awwww!””I could just hold this babe and gaze at her forever…”  “Isn’t she perfect” “Unconditional love… now I get it” “please Jenn, please Jenn, please Jenn don’t screw this up!!!!”

Willing to wear a happy birthday sticker on her forehead. Willing to spend her 18th birthday with her best friend, her mom, sister & brother. Willing to go to the lounge with her mom and dad & same friend and order her first, legal drink with us. We think we did a good job raising her…I don’t think we screwed up too badly anyway – lol! Learn from the first right…

HAPPY 18TH BIRTHDAY MY PRECIOUS LITTLE BABY-DOLL TAYLOR DAWN GREEN CHAMBERS !!!

I LOVE YOU SO SO VERY MUCH & I KNOW THAT YOU WILL SUCCEED IN ALL THAT YOU DO & I AM SO BLESSED TO HAVE YOU.  I THANK GOD FOR YOU EVERY DAY! ❌😘❌😘❌😘❌😘‼️‼️

To help with research and treatment for Trigeminal Neuralgia please go to http://www.tnnme.com (Trigeminal Neuralgia and Me) to sign a petition to have the World Health Organization (WHO) add Trigeminal Neuralgia (TN) to their “Health Topic List.

Hopefully one day I’ll get it right, or at least have fun, while about it I write!!

PS: writing this made me ball, so I guess I did cry on your birthday!

PSS: Taylor,sadly, (in booming daddy voice) if you live under our roof you still have to follow house rules, do chores etc…lol!!! love you hon😘

Tomorrow my baby will be 18!!!! Holy cow!! I can’t wrap my head around that… I keep thinking about it, how can she be 18?? It’s too crazy for words. My face and head are unbearable today. Just wanted to crawl into a hole all day. Just keep repeating the thought of that number again and again…18?? Seriously? How can that be?? Sorry. That’s all I have today. Feel like hell…

How do you let your baby set sail???

To help with research and treatment for Trigeminal Neuralgia please go to http://www.tnnme.com (Trigeminal Neuralgia and Me) to sign a petition to have the World Health Organization (WHO) add Trigeminal Neuralgia (TN) to their “Health Topic List. 

Hopefully one day I’ll get it right, or at least have fun, while about it I write!!

PS Did I mention that my baby turns 18 tomorrow???

My biggest accomplishment today is getting the dishes done. Yep. That’s it. I have nothing else to show for. That’s my day. Other than that, well nothing! Pretty sad right?? Hmmm… Anything else??  Well, I talked to my mom for a while. A couple of my uncles and aunts are arriving for a visit with my parent’s at their BC house. My mom and dad have been in BC for a long time. I don’t like it when they’re gone so long. I miss them and my kiddos do as well. My oldest daughter and my mom are close too. However, she (& my dad) won’t even be here for my baby’s 18th birthday!😓 That makes me (& her) a little sad. But, my dad’s brothers are in their mid-eighties, so they take every opportunity to see each other. So, anything else I did today…What else? What else? Well… My little man and I looked up “how to’s” to find instructions on how to draw Captain America. My oldest absolutely loves him and anything to do with him, so my youngest wants to draw a picture of him for a gift for her birthday (that sounded much more complicated than it actually is, with all of he he’s and she’s, I just try to not use my kids names on here, although I’m not sure if it actually matters, as for the most part it’s just family and friends who read this!!) I played minecraft again (sigh) and the stickman game. And, now, I’m going to sleep. Looking forward to another full and productive day – lol!!!!!

To help with research and treatment for Trigeminal Neuralgia please go to http://www.tnnme.com (Trigeminal Neuralgia and Me) to sign a petition to have the World Health Organization (WHO) add Trigeminal Neuralgia (TN) to their “Health Topic List. 

Hopefully one day I’ll get it right, or at least have fun, while about it I write!!